What new, refinished dressors can do to a person.

As I'm sittingher in the Library, putting off work...
I'm thinking that life is starting to change for me. Things are slowly getting better. My life has always been rough, for me, for my family, especially for my parents. And I've got to admit, I probably would never be the same if I didn't have the friends that I love so much today. I doubt I would be as happy as I am. I grew Up thinking that my lfie was completely normal, knowing only what my parents had taught me. In a sense, it was normal. And I was happy, fo rthe most part. And I still am. But when I started to get a bit older, I noticed that that girl at school had 5 American Girl Dolls, or that that boy's house had much more things in it than I did. I would bring it up with my parents, telling them that I wanted what they had. I started to relize that I didn't have as much as some of my friends at school. It made me angry, and embarassed. I thought I was rolling in dirt for a house, and I began to think thatw hat I had was just simply not enough. And it only got worse as I got older. But, I was wrong.
AS the years go by, were fixing up those parts of the house that I grew up in that I felt most shameful about, and I know that things are changing.My mom recently got a job with another christian fellowship, and for my birthday this year they promised me a new re-done room. As I was up in my room last night, I was sanding and painting a dressor of mine, and as I stepped away, wiping the dust from my forehead, I saw my life changing before my eyes. I stood before a new, re-finished dressor, and saw the beatiful job that I had done. And I knew, that our house was changing. Surely, but slowly. Things are getting better, and I know it's because of God. I never ever gave up in him even through the worst times of these past few years.
And not to confuse, you, I never WAS rolling in dirt, or starving, but it was the little things that just didn't seem to suffice to this extravagant culture of today's America, that just made me feel like I was not as good as the rest of the world. It was the little things that made me feel like dirt...
but through hard times I have learned to love the things that I used to hate. I'm thankful that I have a bed....and a roof over my head. I have to remember that there are others that do not have nearly as much as I have, and that has inspired me to help those in need.

SO that's the story of my life. I feel now that I don't need to feel ashamed anymore, becuase I will always have people who love me for who I am. I know that God will never let me down, and that What I have now going for me is wonderful and will only get better. I don't need to keep my past a secret anymore. I don't need to feel ashamed about anything... ever. I know that I have an amazing life. I'm always going to be Zoe, though thick and thin

and I promise that those days of shame are over.

-Zoe